Millie’s husband is about to climb a mountain AND spend three months doing military duty. Will she survive? Will the kids survive? What about the 4 chickens, 2 dogs, 1 cat, and a choke-prone horse? We shall see. But one thing is certain, life is a lot harder for many other military spouses out there, so if you’re one of them – thank you.
And speaking of things that are hard, the new year has got the moms thinking about their health and wondering which of the myriad fitness options to try, stating with farm yoga and a sound bath. They discuss the laundry list of things the internet tells them they’re supposed to be doing: cardio, strength training (but not too much strength training), sauna, ice baths, and salt water to name a few. Maxine shares her favorite health-focused Instagramers for women of a certain age and Millie gives a dissertation on Orange Theory.
Who is that woman in the mirror? Why is it so much harder to stay in shape now? When did they get so old? And what’s with the characters at the gym? Will the friends be able to achieve the elusive “fit over 40”? You’ll have to tune in to find out!
If you like hanging out with us, please subscribe, rate, review, and share the podcast. Because a midlife crisis is more fun with friends!
Music: Feather Duster by Shane Ivers – https://www.silvermansound.com
[00:18] Millie’s husband is leaving to climb Mt. Kilimanjaro/play military
[02:16] Millie reminisces about solo parenting as a military spouse & the time her brother-in-law went underway only to surface in an alien world
[08:57] Farm yoga and a sound bath
[10:50] Is it even possible to be fit after 40?
[13:00] Who is that woman in the mirror?
[15:14] Why is staying in shape so hard now?
[25:58] Gym people
[27:48] You can’t out exercise a bad diet (sorry, Millie)
[35:03] Maxine’s favorite health Instagrammers
[35:55] What about intermittent fasting?
[38:58] Saltwater
[40:56] To sauna or not to sauna?
[42:18] Should the friends take the ice plunge?
[47:08] Grab Bag: What’s the worst thing you love and the best thing you hate?
Links:
Transcript
Hey friends, Millie here. Just a quick announcement before we get started. Due to Maxine's dissertation work and my husband's military schedule, we'll be publishing every other week for a while. I know you're disappointed, but don't worry, today's episode is a little extra long, so it should hold you over. Thanks for your understanding, and here we go. Welcome to Reinventing This Shit Show, a podcast for moms who are just trying to make it through the day. I'm Millie.
Maxine:And I'm Maxine. We're friends,
Millie:We're moms. We're
Maxine:having a midlife crisis. Won't you join us? so here we go. Here we are.
Millie:We're catching up, let's catch up. We need a little jingle. Catch up, catch up, with Maxine and Millie.
Maxine:Oh, I like it.
Millie:No, that sucked ass. Okay, anyway, let's catch.
Maxine:Let's catch up. Okay, sorry. I'm not in the same mood I was last time, but I am feeling a little silly. So what's
Millie:right? The holidays are over, the kids are still fucking home, and, um, you know, you're just kind of putting your head down and powering through, right? Figuring out all, yeah, you're face down in that wine, um, figuring out all the things that you're gonna do now that the start of the year is among us, and Um, so that's, that's where my head's at, is just like, Here we go, new year, what are we doing? Yeah,
Maxine:a huge gap. Yeah, yeah. The holiday gap, they are all crunched together and then it's like,
Millie:You fall off a cliff,
Maxine:yeah, it's like, although what I'm gearing up for is husband to be
Millie:I know, which is fucking nuts. That's fab. We still have, what, like six weeks ish?
Maxine:Yeah, something like that. So he's gone for two and a half weeks to climb Mount Kilimanjaro.
Millie:What a dick, I forgot he was doing that.
Maxine:my God, you should see our Amazon cart. Well, it's not even in the cart. He just ding, ding, ding, ding. I wake up in the morning, there's like 20, your Amazon package is
Millie:Uh huh, uh huh. Yeah.
Maxine:um. Yeah, so he'll be gone for two and a half weeks for that, and then he's home for a couple weeks, and then he's gone for three months. So,
Millie:It's crazy.
Maxine:yeah, I mean
Millie:part of the gig, but it's
Maxine:spouses go, I have it easy, but I haven't, I haven't solo parented
Millie:So does it ever get any easier? I mean, you've been, you've been doing this gig for damn near two decades now, but does
Maxine:yeah, because when he first did it, I had Toddlers and infants and I mean, he, he was gone. Um, I remember one night, the oldest, my oldest daughter was really sick and I had a newborn in the house. She's asleep and, um, no husband had the nearest hospitals 45 minutes away and knew I had to take her. It's like, what am I going to do with, I got to wake up the. preemie, my preemie baby, like this tiny little, like she's finally asleep. And oh my God. So I went next door and I knocked on the next door neighbor's front door. He happened to be the pediatrician on base. I was like,
Millie:that's
Maxine:can you just come sit in my living room in case my baby wakes up? I got to go to the hospital. So yeah, I went to take older daughter 45 minutes away. Yeah. Yeah. That guy was an angel. Um, but I mean, that's just, you know, the military life. Yeah. You kind of just take care of each
Millie:I feel like that's such a flippant thing to say though. Oh, that's part of the deal. Well, it's still fucking impossible for the people who are living in it. It's so hard. You know, I don't want to do this right now, but I was thinking actually when we first started, whenever that was the other day, when we were talking about him leaving, I want you to like. Tabulate all the time he's been gone. I'm curious how many years it's going to end up being. You know what I
Maxine:many years it's going to end up being, you know what I mean? friend who her husband was gone like a month. He'd go up to the ice fields. I don't know what they did up there, but they did stuff up in this big ice field. So he'd be gone for like a month and then he'd come home for a month and then he'd be gone for a month. I mean, so people had it a lot worse than I did. Um, but yeah, fucking sucked. It was, and that's why he got out because he, he used to pack a bag to come home.
Millie:Geez.
Maxine:So he would go to like, North Dakota and he'd come home for the weekend and leave most of his stuff at the base in North Dakota and then come home and spend the weekend with us and then fly back. So that's how he missed the birth of second child too. He was on a plane from Hawaii. Poor guy. Right? Yeah, but
Millie:guy. It's just a lot, though.
Maxine:it is a lot. And mine is. It's nothing compared to people. People's spouses go for a year. They go for
Millie:Like, for their entire marriage. Like, that's how it is. I just You know, kudos, because that is such a huge sacrifice in a relationship.
Maxine:My sister in law has been through it.
Millie:Oh yeah, because they're in Spain or something, or did I
Maxine:in Italy now and he's on shore duty. So that's great. that was their reward for all of these years of him being on a submarine. But she got hit by a car in front of her two kids while he was deployed. Had to like hospital, like the whole thing with two small children. they've had broken bones. They've had all sorts of, Oh, here's a great story. Let's. Am I taking up too much time? Well, whatever. This is a great story.
Millie:So, um,
Maxine:So, right before COVID happened, my brother in law deployed on a submarine. Okay, so they're not even like somewhere where they can get the internet. I mean, sometimes they can, but they go dark a lot, like completely dark, no communication in or out. So he came
Millie:the Buccaneers, so that was like
Maxine:Brady had moved to the Buccaneers, so that was like a huge thing because, you know, he's a big football guy. the house that his family was living in when he left was no longer their house because they found black mold in it and the military had to move them.
Millie:cancer. Oh
Maxine:And I had cancer.
Millie:went underwater for life.
Maxine:Yeah. He went underwater for like a few weeks and he came back up and he was like, am I on a different planet? Like what the hell?
Millie:Oh my
Maxine:Yeah. So, I mean, that, it's a, it's a crazy life for them. This is, this is nothing. Husband's going to be in an office, it's a, it's a long drive, but we could drive up there, you know, if we wanted to be in an office, he's safe. Talk on the phone, you know, FaceTime, all that stuff. So it used to be a lot harder, especially when I was, in Italy and had a newborn and he was supposed to deploy. thankfully his boss put the kibosh on it and he said, Nope, he's got a three month old at home and no family, you know, we were over there, you know, so I'm basically alone. and he was going to go to Afghanistan. So he was pissed though. He was so
Millie:go.
Maxine:He didn't. It's not that he wanted to go. It's that it was his duty to go. His name came up. It was his time. Someone else had to go instead of him. He did not have a deployment then on his record. And then it happened again. Um, because something was going on, there was staff changing over and when he was supposed to go, he was going to be the only one left in the office that had certain knowledge for something that was happening. So the boss needed him. He said, you can't, you can't go. You have to stay. You're the only one that knows XYZ. So again,
Millie:So
Maxine:you know, another member of the office had to go in his place, so he was less than thrilled.
Millie:don't know. It's just, I can't even like relate to it, you know, other than just acknowledge the fact that it's a huge sacrifice for everyone that's involved.
Maxine:Yeah. is. It is. And I will never. Say that mine is even close to as bad as a lot of people's, but it definitely, you know, there were times when it was hard. I won't go into details about taking my daughter to the hospital, um, but it was super fucking traumatic and he wasn't there and it was really hard.
Millie:think that's the part for me that would be so hard is those tough times and those really great times that they miss, you know,
Maxine:Yeah.
Millie:I think that would be tremendously difficult. But you know, you, you do this huge thing for your country and that's part of the deal, but
Maxine:And let's be honest, you get a lot back the military really, at least, for us, cause my husband's an officer. So there is a level of privilege there, I guess, in the way, in the amount he's paid, how he's treated, all of that stuff. A lot of, you know, the enlisted guys start out on a much lower salary. Um, they're just, they're not treated as well. They don't have as much say. A lot of times in what they're doing. So, you know, it's extra hard for them. Anyway, well I guess that's our catch up.
Millie:Yeah. I
Maxine:If you're in the military, thank you.
Millie:Yeah. Geez.
Maxine:Yeah.
Millie:Yeah. Okay.
Maxine:yeah, we were supposed to talk about this thing that we're going to do. Well, it ties into what we wanted to
Millie:Well, we can, it's nothing really. I just wanted to say that I was excited about it, that we're doing this. It's like a yoga morning, but, it's on a local farm, which I think is so cool because it ties to the whole, cause that farm does the same thing as one of the other local farms where they. you come and you pick up a weekly box of produce, and when we do this yoga thing, they're actually gonna give us boxes for free, which I'm so excited about. and then we're doing some fuckin sound bath, which, don't tell me, because I'm sure you're fuckin Mother Earth shit, you've done this
Maxine:before. No, I have,
Millie:I am, but not with the weird, you know, in touch with the universe shit. You do that
Maxine:the Jewish museum.
Millie:I'm so excited, because I don't know what the fuck it is, other than, you know, Noise for my ears.
Maxine:will, we'll have to dig into it next time. Because
Millie:I'm excited. Yeah, I don't want Cause I was gonna look it up and I was like, nah, I'm not gonna look it up.
Maxine:I mean, I don't think it's going to be earth shattering. It's called a sound bath. I think you're going to,
Millie:And I'm
Maxine:probably just about what you're thinking it is.
Millie:along with yoga and all that. But I'm excited to see how it goes. And that we're gonna be outside. I fucking love yoga outside. I
Maxine:Yeah.
Millie:do.
Maxine:And my husband is taking, younger daughter to her dance convention that weekend so that
Millie:Hey, that's a win. All the way around, actually.
Maxine:know. At least this time he doesn't have to do her makeup.
Millie:Oh god.
Maxine:No, it's gonna be
Millie:Yeah, anyway, so yeah, listener, we'll keep you posted on the farm yoga,
Maxine:Yes, we're going to come back, um, transformed,
Millie:I think so.
Maxine:right? Yeah.
Millie:And bathed in
Maxine:sound. Bathed in sound.
Millie:but you're right. So it does kind of go along with what we want to talk about today, which is since it's the new year and we're, some of us are making resolutions and some of us are adding positive things into our lives. Um, we want to talk about how it's even fucking possible to be fit after 40 and be in shape and be eating all the things that we're supposed to be. Eating for our ever changing bodies, with shit hanging down now, and falling off of our skulls, and
Maxine:what is falling off of your skull? My
Millie:my face! What? Why do I have jowls now? Like, what's happening? Which I don't think exercise and diet is going to do much for that, but anyway,
Maxine:Yeah, I think jowls are just,
Millie:They're here to
Maxine:they're, do you see all those things on Instagram for like face
Millie:I know,
Maxine:It can't work,
Millie:Well, and I've been doing some of the lymphatic drainage and shit and like massaging my face. I'm going to get one of those, one of
Maxine:of those,
Millie:Yeah, gua sha or gua, gua cha,
Maxine:it wound up in the cupboard.
Millie:I have some things, but
Maxine:But I don't know what I'm, what am I supposed to do with it? Like I,
Millie:I don't
Maxine:it came from China and it had like four words written on it and a weird drawing and I was like, what am I supposed to do with this
Millie:like, okay, I got it. Yeah,
Maxine:Yeah, sure. Scrape, scrape my
Millie:I know. I don't know, but maybe if I start scraping my face a little bit, it will stay upright instead of sliding down.
Maxine:don't think So, Well, I hope so.
Millie:don't know. But anyway.
Maxine:anyway. Ugh.
Millie:We are going to be fit after 40, right?
Maxine:days.
Millie:why I started that, well, you said it today too, because that, sadly, that's exactly where I went. Oh, fit after, that's what it is, get fit after 40. It sounds
Maxine:after 40. Sounds
Millie:a PBS workout thing,
Maxine:it does.
Millie:Some lady like doing chair yoga, right? I feel
Maxine:God. Or Suzanne Somers. Rest in peace. Or, um,
Millie:Jane Fonda with her leg warmers.
Maxine:Who, um, Susan Powder?
Millie:Oh, is that with the spiky hair? Ooh, yeah, God, where's she
Maxine:been? I don't know.
Millie:Crazy lady. Okay. So how are we feeling about this whole aging and fit thing? Are the, do they go together? No?
Maxine:I'm gonna go ahead and give aging a big fat thumbs down. Um, don't recommend that.
Millie:Well, and you said something to me this week that is 1000 percent how I feel and probably our listener feels this way too. Um, you look in the mirror and you don't know who the fuck that
Maxine:who the
Millie:Isn't that trippy as
Maxine:that trippy? I know. I know.
Millie:Who the fuck
Maxine:Cause like, your words
Millie:I know, cause like your words and brain, all of that is happening kind of, for the most
Maxine:mostly. But, but, today, I
Millie:but, but today, I mean, I'm looking at my face and I'm like, what, what is that? What's happening?
Maxine:and I will tell you for me it started during chemo because I literally would look in the mirror and be like I don't know this person who's like yellow and has no eyebrows and you know It's I'm not gonna get into all of that. But and I've slowly come back from that a little bit I mean the eyebrows struggle is real Although I think they're coming back
Millie:Yes. Yes.
Maxine:But the pill that I have to take to keep my estrogen from to keep from having any estrogen I It it's like I wake up every six months and realize oh, that's why I feel 80 I wake up every day. My hands hurt. My feet hurt. All my joints hurt. I feel old I feel like I can't exercise everything hurts and then every like six months I go. Oh, it's that fucking pill.
Millie:Is that what it is? Well then what's my reason? What then? Because I'm not taking that pill. So what am I, yeah, that is, yeah, I do, but that's, and I, I do notice and I fucking hate it. I do notice that the more sugar and alcohol I consume, the harder it is to get up in the morning. Like the stiffer I am a lot of the time. And when I'm not boozing and, you know, eating 12 dozen Christmas cookies, I'm not as, it doesn't bother me as much. Yeah, seriously, like there actually is, unfortunately. A link to that whole inflammation sugar
Maxine:mean, I think that's
Millie:Yeah, I mean, I think that's the stiffness and you know, the aging a little bit and like you said, the arthritis, which we all have now.
Maxine:now. When the fuck did that happen? I don't, know. I was 25, like, a week ago.
Millie:don't know. Well, and just with the whole like, okay, being in shape, being healthy, it is so much harder now 10 years ago, even five years ago, quite honestly. you know, the exercise, the things that we could do in our thirties, you know, power walking and jogging and spin class and don't really have the same effect now that they used to, at least in my experience now, listener, maybe you're not there, but I have spent last January. I started working with a personal trainer. to learn how to use gym equipment because I've never fucking used it and um, I've always been kind of a runner. When I say runner, I mean barely jogging. So like. What the fuck?
Maxine:And when I say runner, I mean barely
Millie:between two and a half, three miles tops. Okay. I'm not like an actual runner, but um,
Maxine:miles tops. Okay, I'm not like an actual runner. But, um, It was like, it said like, I run. I run like a turtle through molasses, but I
Millie:that is 1, 000 percent how
Maxine:But see, you're running. It's still
Millie:Yeah, but anyway, my point is I've never had issues With weight, if I was drinking or whatever a little too much, having too much ice cream, just do some more running and it would, you know, that doesn't work now. So, okay, so started last January and you and I were just talking about this. I have lost 15 pounds in one year. Took me a fucking year to lose 15 pounds.
Maxine:pounds. What? But are you losing inches? Are you getting stronger?
Millie:I don't
Maxine:do you feel like you're gaining
Millie:Yes, Definitely.
Maxine:Okay, because muscle weighs more than fat and blah blah
Millie:Yeah, but I did some hardcore weight stuff for a while and I found that I, it didn't make my body feel very good. Like, um, you know, because, and we're going to talk about this a little bit, but like, Influencers and doctors and people will say to us, in our 40s now, we need to be lifting weights. Everybody needs to be doing that. It's super important for women, perimenopause, menopause, postmenopause, like, you need to be lifting weights. Well, so I was really subscribing to that and, you know, lifting weights three, four times a week. Um, I don't, I didn't lose weight, which I know muscle weighs more than fat, whatever, but also I didn't feel very good. It was, it was kind of uncomfortable. Like, I, so I'm still doing some of the strength training, but it's more resistance training than it
Maxine:it is, I'm not
Millie:And I'm not, I'm not dead lifting and I'm not, you know, I don't know, lifting shit over my head and I'm not using a lot of like weights on bars. I'm using a lot of like bands and stuff
Maxine:So you're using like your body weight, the like, like, do you do, I love TRX.
Millie:I see. I've never done that.
Maxine:I love it. I worked with a woman for a while cause we all know I have this weird back issue, um, that and I did TRX so there's, it was, there's zero impact cause it's all using the bands and stuff and your own body weight. I love
Millie:Huh, I've never done
Maxine:I love it. The problem at my gym is there's only one tiny little area where you can do what you want to do. Um, everything else is machines and every time I fucking go there's a class. So I'm like, I can't
Millie:But can you do it at home? In the studio?
Maxine:I bought a TRX setup, which I would buy and then use for a week and never touch
Millie:And that's my problem. I suck at working out at home. I have to like You know, the trainer that I'm working with now, who is fucking awesome, but I have to physically go to her or I'm not, you know, she can't hear work on this at home. I won't do it. I need to be, I don't know.
Maxine:I don't know. I just lost
Millie:ha
Maxine:thought while you were talking. I lost my train of thought. How does that
Millie:Well, I just was saying that if she, the trainer that I'm working with right now, if she gives me some exercises to do at home, I'm never going to fucking do them. I have to be, I like classes, I do take a walk every single day and that's different than from a year ago. So if I'm not running, I'm walking and I'm, I'm walking at least 45 to 50 minutes probably. so I feel like I'm awesome for walking and running as much as I do, but apparently that doesn't fucking matter at our age.
Maxine:I think it matters for your mental health. Cause you always tell me, like, if I'm in a funk, make sure you're getting
Millie:Well, and the sunlight is supes, supes important. I'm getting that D.
Maxine:D. But, um, Which D exactly are you talking about? Um, but
Millie:but, it's still good for you, fuck, it's
Maxine:so, it's so good for you, but,
Millie:but not for weight loss apparently, but I don't know, there's lots of schools of thought because I, I do read that some folks say that no, it still is really good
Maxine:well, and you see like all over Instagram, like I get advertisements every day for like indoor walking, um, or I don't know, I get like somatic workouts too. You can't lose weight if you're holding emotions in
Millie:know. I tried that for like four days. Have you tried that yet? Oh, you asked me about it. I mean, there's so many, right? Like how many things have you tried? I know.
Maxine:It's so overwhelming.
Millie:think that the bottom line there, because I'm the expert, because I've tried every bucket, I think you really just need to do something that you like. Like that's the biggest thing.
Maxine:and that is why, that's one reason why I joined my adult Tappity Tap
Millie:I know. That's
Maxine:Um, Yeah, the first day I went, I almost cried halfway through because I was like, my brain doesn't work like it used to. I was a decent tapper. I was never a great tapper, but I, I did take private tap lessons briefly. And I, the woman who taught it said, you're a natural tapper. You're good at this. And I was like, oh, that's great. Well. Cool. Not anymore. Like, she's calling out these steps. I'm like looking around. I'm
Millie:Stop going so fast!
Maxine:it.
Millie:Slow
Maxine:Now part of it was because I was wearing shoes that I, that were from like five years ago. My feet aren't, my feet have grown since then. And so my heels were like bleeding. So that might've been part of the reason that I was crying in tap class. But mostly it was just the frustration of like, my body won't do this anymore. It's what the fuck happened.
Millie:No, but I think, I think that that's the most important thing is to just keep moving.
Maxine:keep moving.
Millie:when you don't, it doesn't, I really don't think it matters what it is, quite honestly. Like, I know we need to strength train and you can figure out some sort of way to do that that maybe isn't so aggressive as, Some of the, ugh, F 45, fuck. I'll call them out because the listener probably doesn't care. But, um,
Maxine:didn't even know what that
Millie:I did not love it. It's,
Maxine:F 45.
Millie:there's, it's like a chain. It's all over the country. Um,
Maxine:Well,
Millie:just felt very aggressive.
Maxine:Yeah. There's the one, there's a gym that I drive by all the time that's, I don't even remember the name of it, but it's something like, it might as well be like,
Millie:like, Oh, is it like Megalodon? One of
Maxine:well, something like that. Only it's even worse. It's almost like vicious kickboxing. Like, come in and let us beat your brains out. I mean, it really. Viper or Venom. I think it might be Venom. I'm like, I am not going in there. Nope. Okay, anyway.
Millie:so, um, yeah, it's, it's, it's aggressive and I'm sure it works for people, like a lot of people. And if you're like 30 and your joints can handle it, it's, it's
Maxine:joints can handle it,
Millie:So it's kind of like that. It's circuit training, but it's, it's like that. It's a lot of heavy work, heavy lifting or like crazy cardio where you're doing like burpees for five minutes or something insane. Like, I just.
Maxine:super fun.
Millie:It's too aggressive for me.
Maxine:I liked orange theory.
Millie:heard good things. Tell me about
Maxine:it's much less aggressive. I was doing it for a while and then my back started acting up and I just couldn't, or maybe it was, yeah, that's what happened. So I was doing it for a while. COVID happened and I was doing it at home. They released all these videos on YouTube so I could work out at home, which was awesome. Awesome. And then we decided to sell our house and buy a new one. And I was working from home in the garage with no air conditioning. Both of my children were doing school at home and we were packing up an entire house to move in the middle of a pandemic and no one was helping me. I was the only one packing.
Millie:That sounds fine.
Maxine:So I got real stressed out and, oh, lo and behold, all of a sudden my back gave out and I was on crutches. Guess who couldn't do any of the packing anymore? Like I didn't do that on purpose, but my brain did. Yeah. So that's when I stopped and then I never went back because my back
Millie:do they do stuff at Orange Theory? Like, what,
Maxine:Okay, so Orange Theory, um, you wear like this heart monitor and it's a specific one because it, like Bluetooth connects to their system. So you start out either on a treadmill or a rower, just warming up, and then, it's a circuit. So you've got one group on the treadmill, and so after warmups, the treadmill group, amps it up, right? So you're really, it's cardio. You're working, and you're working to your own specific level. So you're watching the screen telling you, are you in the red zone, the orange zone?
Millie:zone, or green
Maxine:Yellow zone or green zone, I think. And you want to spend most of your time in the orange zone, which is like, you're not full out, like you could still do more, but it's still pretty difficult. And so you're not competing with anybody around you. Like if you're walking and you're in the orange zone and someone else is running, like. a mad person. It doesn't matter. You're working to your zone. And then the timer goes off or they whistle. I don't know what they did. They tell you to switch. And then that group would go and do like, resistance training or strength training or planks or whatever the daily workout happens to be. It's similar to cross fit in that way. And then. When you're done there, you go to the rowing machine and it's the same thing. You're doing more cardio and they were awesome They you know, you you do to your own ability
Millie:I would skip
Maxine:I would skip the rowing machine a lot because it hurt my back and so I would just go walk on the treadmill instead and I loved maybe it was that specific orange theory, but They were just
Millie:Okay.
Maxine:I wasn't intimidated
Millie:Yeah. Yeah, and that's my deal with gyms, too. Like, I can't go to a gym gym because it's just too, and I, I spent, like, two months there with a trainer, learning how to do stuff, and it was, I still can't go. it's just too much. I can't wait for machines, and I can't really remember what I'm supposed to do, and there's people waiting, and
Maxine:are waiting and watching. Yes. Can we talk about gym people for a second?
Millie:too much. I
Maxine:gym we go to now, which is a very nice gym, it's very nice. It's very, it's inexpensive. It's a like 24 seven. You can go when you want. everyone is very nice. I've never, you know, felt like anyone was judging me or being, you know, difficult or whatever. in this gym, like one day I went, my husband was there at the same time. There was a man there, he was probably in his 60s, in like a sweatsuit, bare feet doing like karate
Millie:ha
Maxine:by himself. So That was strange. Then there's like the 20 something couples that are clearly like dating and this is their
Millie:and they met there probably, yeah. and then
Maxine:And then there's the woman the older woman that I see she's probably in her 70s or 80s
Millie:70s or
Maxine:She's full on wearing like Her clothes are from Talbot's and she's working out in her little Mary Jane flats and her Talbot's outfit. I'm like, what are you even doing?
Millie:Oh my God, I love
Maxine:Gym people
Millie:Because I know what you're talking about. The gym that I went to, all of those people that you just described were at that
Maxine:mean,
Millie:It's insane. Anyway, so, okay, so
Maxine:it's insane anyway. So okay. So we've talked about the gym thing and how we have to keep moving. No matter what, it's best to do something that we enjoy.
Millie:because otherwise you're not gonna fuckin do it. There's
Maxine:so I think, A, we know we have to keep moving. And that's pretty much it, because all of the information is so contradictory. It
Millie:Yeah, I mean, it, you hear different things, you know, strength train, don't strength train, although that one's pretty consistent across the board, but cardio doesn't matter. Cardio does matter. You know, like there's so many different things
Maxine:Yep, but the one thing I hear consistently is that you cannot out exercise a bad diet, which is really a problem for me.
Millie:No, that's true,
Maxine:As you
Millie:I'm eating a cookie, but they're healthy. It's fine.
Maxine:Sure, mm hmm. Yeah, sure
Millie:No, but it's, it's. It doesn't matter how much you exercise if you put garbage into your temple.
Maxine:your temple. Yes, my
Millie:Your body's a temple, friends. it's so true, and that, that part's easier for me.
Maxine:I'm a garbage pail kid.
Millie:The, the healthy eating thing has, is a lot easier for me just because I've been doing it for so long. But I did do some tweaking this past year, as did you, with the whole dairy thing. I discovered that that was the source of a lot of my tummy trubs.
Maxine:Although dairy, cutting out the dairy has not dropped the weight like it did. when younger daughter was born, we found out that she was lactose intolerant, basically. So like if I had any dairy whatsoever, she was a nightmare, which a nightmare preemie. I mean, nobody was sleeping. It was awful. And they told me not only to cut out dairy, I had to cut out soy too. So all of your dairy substitutes were soy. And I was living in Fairbanks, Alaska.
Millie:couldn't have anything.
Maxine:They didn't have fake anything back then. I mean, soy milk was the only non dairy milk, so I had nothing, like nothing. And the weight fell off
Millie:Yeah, because you weren't having anything.
Maxine:I couldn't eat anything. But,
Millie:Yeah Yeah, but think about it. It hasn't been that long and there have there's times that we're not able to stick to
Maxine:there's no dairy and alcohol,
Millie:Yeah, there's that That's a
Maxine:not really drinking, you know, because I was breastfeeding.
Millie:Well that you know kudos to you for not being a drunk while you're breastfeeding. That was very good. But um And it's what I said previously, which is, anything that you do now, modifications that you do now, just takes so much longer. It just does. It takes so much longer. Because I stopped dairy, like, in May. And then I really did see some shit, like, August, September, from that. Fucking took four months, you
Maxine:And I was doing really well on the dairy until we went on the cruise. And then we, my husband and I kept going to that Indian place and it was so good. And they had this chicken korma. that said on it that it was cashew cream, you know, whatever. And nothing on that cruise was marked gluten free, dairy free. It was none, nothing was marked. So I assumed it was dairy free.
Millie:Yeah. Yeah, no.
Maxine:that thing had cream in it for sure.
Millie:Yeah.
Maxine:So my best intentions,
Millie:No, and it's just, it's fucking hard. And plus, like, for me, because I've been gluten free for like 12 years now, but, I hate going to restaurants and being that guy, you know, like, um, do you, do you have gluten free and, uh, do you have anything dairy free? Like, that
Maxine:I had to do that today. We went to lunch and I
Millie:I just won't. I just won't eat, or I'll have a salad or something like that, because I just don't like doing that. Or
Maxine:I didn't like it
Millie:we'll go somewhere that I know they have tons of substitutions and modifications, you know, that they do that and so I don't have to feel like such an asshole. Yeah. but
Maxine:open.
Millie:the healthy food thing, yeah, you were saying, like, that's, It's, it's hard and if you're not eating good shit, yeah, you're not going to see any results, especially now. Well, and so, I, there's two, people that I, and there's 85 million, but there's two chicks that I follow on Instagram that are really, focused on taking care of yourself after 40, specifically with food
Maxine:Okay.
Millie:And since we're talking about food, they, and I mean, everyone's saying this, in addition to the strength training is the protein, which is something that is supes hard for me. I am not good at getting protein in. I could probably be vegan, vegetarian. And I, and I, I would say. Not always, but in the last couple of months since I'm kind of tweaking my diet again, I'm probably 65 to 70 percent Veggie, veggies only, like vegetarian
Maxine:See, this is my problem. I cannot get enough vegetables into my body.
Millie:and that's yeah, you know why
Maxine:thing I think about.
Millie:and I know everybody says that Oh, it's so easy. Just do this. No, it's not I know it's not because I do it and I'm fortunate enough to be at home and have time to like cook I
Maxine:cook of the family.
Millie:cook all the
Maxine:Yeah, I'm not the cook. So I have zero control over what is being
Millie:but I don't believe that it's as easy as everyone makes it out to be, because I'm doing it every single day. And, yeah, I'm getting easily six to ten servings of, eh, seven to ten servings of fruits and vegetables every single day. But it's because I'm fucking cooking all day long. Or I'm prepping things, or I'm doing stuff for the next day. Like, it's not easy. No wonder nobody can get fruits and vegetables in. It's a pain in the ass. Yeah, it
Maxine:And I mean, I'll eat them raw, so that's another thing.
Millie:but how often really you're gonna eat fucking raw celery carrots and tomatoes and Old every single day. That's so boring like you
Maxine:Yeah, it
Millie:it is and you can't do that every
Maxine:that every day. At
Millie:At least I can't like I need variety. I'm not somebody that can eat the same stuff every day
Maxine:can eat the
Millie:Yeah, because he's a fucking
Maxine:It's a fucking rainbow.
Millie:Anyway, so, okay, so they're, the big things that they talk about is the protein, the fiber, because our tummies need that fiber, probiotics, that's the big, big one for the gals over 40 because you, you need your gut biome
Maxine:I got a lot of
Millie:this shit. Yeah.
Maxine:That makes me think also about the dairy thing. So the reason that dairy bothers my stomach in particular, um, according to a doctor I saw years ago, is that it. Basically kills off, um, parts, these parts of your stomach that help with digestion. So, you know, take it for what it's worth. But so that makes a lot of sense with the probiotics too, to help
Millie:Yeah, and it's, and like the fermented food, which I don't think anybody has done except in the last few years. I'm sure other people were before, but the sauerkraut, the kombucha, the anything pickled, you know, we do like pickled carrots and onions and
Maxine:Have you had pickled asparagus?
Millie:I do
Maxine:hmm. Real good.
Millie:My husband does some pickling here and there
Maxine:We need to just move our two families in together and then we can like all like together we make a functional
Millie:have really good resources, yeah. I'm not opposed to it as long as I don't have to see your husband that much and he's gone a lot. So that's, that's actually a really good idea. Okay.
Maxine:it's like sister wives except for without the Oh my god, that's
Millie:God, those blessed sisters. Boy, they're really going through some shit, aren't they? They have fallen the fuck apart.
Maxine:fuck apart. What? That didn't work?
Millie:what? That didn't work? Oh my God. Okay. So anyway, so fermented food, right? And, and both of these gals, one of which Health with Holland is what she's called. Her name is Becca Holland. She's fucking amazing.
Maxine:to follow
Millie:And then, um, fasting MD. She's Dr. Amy, but she's
Maxine:whole fasting
Millie:well, so yeah, actually I did want to talk about that. That's something that she talks about, but But, but there's other stuff, Becca talks a little bit about fasting, but her big thing is getting your hormones straight because if you can get your hormones the way they need to be, your cortisol levels the way they need to be, your anxiety the way, and there are foods that you need to be eating to make all of that work the way that it's supposed
Maxine:I'm into it. Now does that work when you're artificially suppressing hormones?
Millie:I, she is somebody that you could message and she would give you an
Maxine:Really? Okay. really cool. Okay. What was her name again for our listener?
Millie:health with Holland.
Maxine:with Holland. Okay. Okay. Now let's talk about the fasting because I have a friend who went through the same cancer journey that I do, that I did. So she's in very much the same boat. She's been fasting for quite a while now, a couple of years, and she swears by it. She loves it. It's helped her keep the weight off.
Millie:off. I
Maxine:With my, sugar levels, and I think I'm like, I don't know, I think I need to have one of those things that tests your blood glucose after you eat, um, I worry about the fasting because I tend to, my blood sugar will drop really drastically, and then I'll get shaky, and I'll get all weird, so I worry about the fasting for myself, but I want to hear what Dr. Amy
Millie:Well, you want to hear what Dr. Maxine says, actually, but, uh,
Maxine:is going to be a doctor
Millie:yeah, not of medicine, friends. So anyway,
Maxine:Still a doctor.
Millie:so I am in the exact same boat as you. I have. I've, I've been diagnosed with hyper, hyperglycemia previously. I have those blood sugar issues. If I don't eat, and my husband likes to joke about this a lot, if I don't eat immediately when I'm hungry, it's bad, shakes, headache, like crazy.
Maxine:crazy. Like you're gonna
Millie:So I. Now, I do try to do the 12 hours at night thing. Um, sometimes it's 11, most of the time it's 11. where I don't eat for 11 hours, 11 hours or 12 hours overnight. During the day, absolutely fucking not, I cannot do it. Can't do it. And in the morning A lot of times I'll do salt water when I wake up so
Maxine:okay. I've never heard of that.
Millie:what
Maxine:No. Tell me about saltwater.
Millie:okay, so wait, no
Maxine:Okay. Sorry. We're
Millie:We're talking we're fasting right now. Then we'll talk about salt
Maxine:Okay. It's hard to be my friend guys. I'm all over the fucking place. Have I told you about bilateral music? I discovered that last night. We talked about that
Millie:Stop I have to pee and my stomach
Maxine:I'm sorry. So
Millie:Um, so anyway, so fasting, not for me, but my oldest son is actually doing it right now. He loves it for quick weight loss. He's 22, so works really well for him. But I'm with you. There's a ton of people I know that have done it and it works beautifully
Maxine:supposed to be great for, the
Millie:It's great for your digestion
Maxine:the first person I heard it from was an old friend of mine who had breast cancer, unfortunately she did not survive her breast cancer, but she she fought it for a long time and she did a lot of research and one of the things that she learned was about fasting and how it's so good for your cells and it's a good cancer preventative, you know,
Millie:No. I've heard
Maxine:really good for you.
Millie:I just can't fucking do it. I can, I'm really trying to do consistently the 12 hour thing, but it's not consistent. It happens maybe 30, 40 percent of the time,
Maxine:Okay, but I still feel like that would do something
Millie:Yeah, but most of these motherfuckers are doing it for like 14 hours, 16 hours. No. I, 11, 12 is my absolute max. I cannot do it longer than that. Cause I'm too
Maxine:like anything I think it works for some people it doesn't work for other people and you know What works for you is great
Millie:Yeah.
Maxine:But okay saltwater
Millie:Saltwater. So, you're hella dehydrated when you wake up, like major, major, major. And so there's all of this research and studies and stuff that, salt in the morning is really, really good for hydrating your body quickly, getting those electrolytes, um, cause you know, Himalayan salt has like magnesium and potassium and, other shit, other electrolytes in it. and so I have, I've done that for a while now, I drink it in the morning,
Maxine:feel like are the effects from that?
Millie:I, I'm hydrated really quickly. I will say my migraines are so much less than they used to be. And that was the reason why I started drinking it initially was because I had read that most of the time. salt will fix headaches. Like if you, if you are somebody that has headaches a lot, which I am, and so that's why I started it initially, but then I was reading about how it's really good to have it first thing in the morning. And honestly, I don't have a lot of headaches anymore. I really
Maxine:do you just, it's just salt water? Do you put like apple cider vinegar or do you
Millie:I'll do that separately because I like for that to just be on its own. I put lemon with it.
Maxine:Okay. Cause it seems like it'd be hard to get salt water, straight salt water
Millie:fucking gross, I buy this flavored stuff. It's another brand. Boy we're plugging everybody today. Redmond's has a brand, has a salt mix called Relight that tastes decent and I throw that in with water and lemon and it's fruity. Okay, so the things, the three things I still want to talk about, just because I want to know what you think and I want to know what our listener thinks, even though she can't tell us he,
Maxine:Well, no, she can because we have an email address, reinventing this shit show at gmail. com. Please or our Facebook reinventing this shit show. We've got Instagram. We've got all, all the socials were not, I, we have a, an ex account, but I've never done one thing with it
Millie:because it's
Maxine:I don't want to have anything to do with it. It's not my thing
Millie:Okay. So.
Maxine:So please let us know.
Millie:SANA I want to talk about and I want to talk about cold plunge because these are two things that I'm thinking about getting aboard those trains, especially the SANA train, because I'm reading so many benefits about, and this might interest you too, something about your hormones, the heat, like, helps boost what you've lost, basically. There's shit that you lose when you're in your 40s and I'm, obviously I sound like I know what I'm talking about. Shit that you lose.
Maxine:Shit that you lose, what kind of
Millie:That the sauna regenerates.
Maxine:Okay. At the gym that I, I go to, I pay an extra 5 a month for the little VIP area, um, which sometimes is the only reason I go to the gym. So it was totally worth the extra 5 massage chairs. There's a red light therapy, there's tanning, which, I mean, what year is it? Come
Millie:know.
Maxine:Um, and there is like an infrared sauna and it's got all these benefits listed. I've never gone in it because. Saunas sound uncomfortable, I don't
Millie:Well, I love that heat, especially when it's cold and my joints hurt. Yes. Give me
Maxine:god, how old are we?
Millie:we're a hundred. But the sauna is supposed to help with arthritis like hella, like big
Maxine:okay.
Millie:So I'm, there's a place. It's near where I live that's just like a sauna place and you pay for sessions or whatever. I'm thinking about doing it, just to kind of see the, the cold plunge thing is supposed to help with all that shit too. I can't do it,
Maxine:I'm terrified.
Millie:health with Holland gal suggests doing an ice bath for your face in the mornings. She says that you will get similar benefits and it lowers cortisol and all this
Maxine:Well, I will tell you that one way to stimulate your vagus nerve is ice water on your chest or
Millie:you're. supposed to do that. so to
Maxine:I can see how it would now, Adrian, I'm talking to you right now. I don't know if she still listens. I know she listened at least once because all the people, you know, they're nice and they listen once. Maybe she's still listening. Adrienne, if you are listening, please email me at reinventing this shit show at gmail. com and tell me all about your cold plunge. She, I see her on Facebook all the time. She goes out, she lives up in Pennsylvania. she and her friends go out into the woods into oh God, like ice cold lakes during the winter and and she's always in an ice bath. I don't know. I don't know
Millie:Yeah,
Maxine:how she has time to work. She's always in an ice
Millie:ice bath. Well, my trainer, Kylie, she, I think she has, she has one at home, or she fills it with ice at
Maxine:friend Mel Robbins has one. I saw that on
Millie:I know, but Mel Robbins has like the fancy one. Kylie has like a baby pool or something. I don't know what it is, but, um, I, I just, I don't know. I don't, I'm worried I'm gonna have a fucking heart attack if I get in that cold water. I'm like actually worried about
Maxine:Yeah.
Millie:So I think I'm just gonna, these
Maxine:I like the one on the face though. I can handle
Millie:That I think I can do since we've been talking, you know, in the, in the spirit of adding new things for the year, both of those things I'm going to try.
Maxine:Okay. Salt water in the morning. Yeah.
Millie:Yeah, you get a lot.
Maxine:Ice. Ice packs on my face.
Millie:I want, I'm going to do the, put my face in the cold water in the morning
Maxine:Okay, sauna.
Millie:to try this on a
Maxine:Maybe if when my husband gets up to get my older daughter ready for school at the crack of dawn.
Millie:You don't even know because you're asleep.
Maxine:Maybe if he came in and just poured ice water on my face, that would
Millie:Do you know how mad
Maxine:He would not be alive anymore.
Millie:Well, both of those chicks that I follow on Insta are big sauna folks. Big ice bath shit folks, too. Like, this is the new
Maxine:to be really good for
Millie:I know, but
Maxine:I believe it. I believe it, but I
Millie:Dude, whatever we can do in this season of
Maxine:Would you please never say season again?
Millie:To, to ease our suffering, to make things a little bit more,
Maxine:we have to freeze our asses off and then get in a sauna and sweat our asses off.
Millie:I don't know. I, I really legit, like starting next week, I'm going to put my fucking face in ice water in the mornings. I'm going to do it. In
Maxine:a new
Millie:to my journaling,
Maxine:Oh, right. Of the journal? Yes. Oh, let's circle back to that for two seconds. Maxine brought a gratitude journal and
Millie:I fucking did, I'm on day three, it's so hilarious,
Maxine:I love it.
Millie:but I, I do like it because it has prompts and it takes 30 seconds. So we'll see.
Maxine:Yeah. And she bought me one, so I will have to report to
Millie:Yeah, well, we'll see. Let's see how long, if we can even get through January, it will be fucking amazing.
Maxine:I don't
Millie:But I am kind of excited about them.
Maxine:I, I'm too. Okay, well,
Millie:me, new year, new you, right?
Maxine:New Year, New
Millie:I think that's all I wanted to talk about.
Maxine:Okay, so to recap, I need to move every day, get up in the morning early and exercise,
Millie:I would. Get it out of the
Maxine:face in ice
Millie:Yeah. Yeah, bitch.
Maxine:go to the sauna, drink salt water in the morning,
Millie:Put some lemon in there too. Good for the tum.
Maxine:It's a lot
Millie:Okay, so let's, we don't need to do all of it, but I, I do want to try the sauna and cold plunge. I'm excited about that.
Maxine:Okay
Millie:So we'll, we'll report back, listener,
Maxine:Sure, we
Millie:on that cold plunge and cold face plunge. Let's not get crazy
Maxine:Yeah, no, I'm not. I, can I just stick my face in the freezer? Like, how are you going to do this?
Millie:You know what, Becca, at Health with Holland, she did say you can just put ice packs on your face, too. If it's too, like, abrasive for you, you can do other stuff and have some similar effects.
Maxine:Yeah. Yeah.
Millie:Yeah, but still we will, we will embark on this or continue. We've already started
Maxine:We have started. You're right. You're right. You're right.
Millie:just gonna throw in some new things, but we've already started. Look at that. Go us.
Maxine:Okay.
Millie:did you want to grab the
Maxine:Yeah, we need to do
Millie:Hold on. I'm gonna go get it Oh, but my legs are
Maxine:Oh my god, I wish you guys could see how she's limping around from this trainer of hers. Okay, should we do one that my kids put in here?
Millie:I don't give a fuck. I'm good with whatever. Yeah, and I, you know, let's not have one that takes until the end of time.
Maxine:We already did that one.
Millie:Maybe we shouldn't throw him back in. Ooh. Ha
Maxine:Okay. Oh.
Millie:Oh, God. I don't like when your face looks like that.
Maxine:I mean, I'm going to give you one that my husband gave me yesterday. This will be a nice quick one, um, because I already know my answer because he already, he already, um, asked me.
Millie:That's kind of cheating, but
Maxine:cheating, but I'll go first and give you time to, to think about it because it's a real quick one. So he texted me last night out of the blue. What is the best thing that you hate and the worst thing that you love?
Millie:About what?
Maxine:just what is the best thing you hate? So
Millie:You know, it is just like him to say something fucking crazy like that. You
Maxine:he's walking the dogs, okay, so here's and I'll tell you his answers too if I can
Millie:I don't want to hear his answers. You go. What are
Maxine:Okay, so the worst thing that I love is the series charmed
Millie:Okay. Oh, that's funny. We just
Maxine:we talked about it last week it is Um, one of the worst TV shows I've ever watched and I fucking love it. whatever. Um, the best thing that I hate is truffles because they're disgusting,
Millie:thing that you hate. Okay, I
Maxine:Cause everyone loves truffle. Everyone loves
Millie:love them. Love
Maxine:I think they're disgusting and I hate them.
Millie:know, and you don't, you'll eat anything. Like, you don't, you're not,
Maxine:I'm not super picky.
Millie:you're not at all.
Maxine:hate truffles.
Millie:Okay, so what's the the worst thing I love? God, that is such a dumb way to say something. Okay. Okay,
Maxine:you more, more examples.
Millie:how about I do a show cuz that's that's good. It's bad. It's real bad.
Maxine:worst,
Millie:The worst thing. Yeah, the worst show that I love is Seventh Heaven. Have you ever watched that show?
Maxine:I used to watch
Millie:Okay, I watched from beginning to the end. I've seen every episode multiple times and the dad who who was in that show got like He didn't get arrested, but somebody came, a teenager came forward and said that he molested her or some shit, and he was like a minister. I love that fucking show. And I
Maxine:That's like mine.
Millie:bringing up Bates and the Duggars, like all, that stuff is disgusting and I watch it. I love it. Not anymore, but I
Maxine:Okay. So what's the best thing that you hate? So, you know, something that everyone loves that you hate, I guess.
Millie:That's, what? I fucking hate everything. Oh You're gonna have to cut the silence out while I think about the best thing that I
Maxine:I'll do a little tap
Millie:the best thing that I hate. I hate so many things, but are they like, best things?
Maxine:I stumped
Millie:What, I, what do I hate that I, like, seriously, I hate everything. I don't, I don't know how to pick one thing.
Maxine:to just leave everything out here. Ugh.
Millie:I do love truffles.
Maxine:other day we
Millie:I'm thinking about truffles more than anything else. I don't really like cheeseburgers.
Maxine:Oh, and everyone loves cheeseburgers. So yeah, cheeseburgers are a great thing. Most people love them. So there you go, cheeseburgers.
Millie:Boom! I did it.
Maxine:All right. So, um, so let's, let's see if Maxine can get this one this week.
Millie:know I really struggled last week, huh? Maybe I was drunk. I don't know.
Maxine:Um, remember.
Millie:A midlife crisis is more fun with friends.
Maxine:Nice
Millie:Thanks, friends. Bye.